One of the study staff, I'm going to refer to them as SS from now on, called and wanted to set up an appointment for me to go over my eating log with her and also to set up my Dexa scan which is a full body x-ray that looks at body composition. I tell her that I'm only available after 5:30 or I will need to bring my children to the eating log appointment but I refuse to bring them to the Dexascan appointment. She says that would be fine and I make the appointment One of the study staff, I'm going to refer to them as SS from now on, called and wanted to set up an appointment for me to go over my eating log with her and also to set up my Dexa scan which is a full body x-ray that looks at body composition. I tell her that I'm only available after 5:30 or I will need to bring my children to the eating log appointment but I refuse to bring them to the Dexascan appointment. She says that would be fine and I make the appointment for the next day and plan to bring my 4 1/2 and 2 1/2 year olds.
This appointment starts out very well. I brought snacks for the kids and then sat and ate and were pleasant little ones for about 15 minutes. Then they start getting restless and begin to wonder around the room a little, just looking but no touching. Then they start talking to SS and asking her questions. I tell them they need to leave SS alone so she can do her work so they move on too looking inside each of the lower cabinets in the room. At first they are just looking then they are pulling things out. I help them put stuff back in and ask them to stay out of them and that they aren't for kids. I begin talking to SS again who is completely distracted and probably annoyed but I did tell her when she called that I could only do appointments after 5:30 unless my kids came and so well this is her fault, right??
SS asks about the blank hour of physical activity where is it moderate to heavy but no description written down. For the life of me I can't remember what I was doing for that hour so I said it must have been when I was unloading the kids and all our stuff from being away for the weekend. Weird that I didn't write it down, oh well. At this time she also tells me I have been selected to be in the high protein group. I say "yippy!" She says, "I thought you would be happy about that." I say, "seriously" She says, "oh you don't like it? It is weird some women really wanted it and some women really didn't want it." I tell her, "I'm not really looking forward to drinking all that stuff."
I look up at the kids and they are on the cabinets looking out the window. Ok, this is so not ok and when did I loose control over these two? Honestly they are good kids but what can you expect from two little ones in a college classroom? I ask for pencil and paper and have them draw at the table while we try to finish our conversation about what I eat and the exchange method which is how I'm going be keeping track of what I eat.
I wish I could tell you I learned something from this appointment or understand the exchange method or that I am ready to start eating a new way in 6 days but I am not. Once we finally get to really talking I notice that the kids aren't just coloring on their papers they are coloring on the table. Not just a little here or there because they can't really control keeping the pencil on the paper edges but they are just flat out scribbling all over the table! SS mentions that maybe we can finish early. I ask for two wet paper towels and put the kids to work. Wet paper towel does nothing to remove pencil from table tops but at least they tried.
It is time to leave and she reminds me of my next appointment and advises me to make sure I bring a grocery sack because they will be giving me my protein powder. She tells me I will be picking up three 1/2 gallon containers. Ok, that isn't bad, I can imagine going through three of those in the 16 weeks but then she says, "that will be enough to last you for the beginning of the study but we will be giving you more later on." What! How much of this junk am I going to consume? I didn't want the high protein but here I am being asked to bring a large grocery sac so I can bring just a part of it home! Take a deep breath....
I left with no new info and feelings on disbelief of my children's behavior. No more kids at any more appointments!
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Monday, December 28, 2009
Moving and Shaking
I payed close attention those four days and I did record everything that I put in my mouth paying close attention that it was all edible.
I was given a food scale so I could carefully record everything that I ate. This was quite a challenge in the beginning to weigh and measure everything edible that I put in my mouth but I did it and by the middle of day two it got easier.
I was also given a pedometer to record all of my physical activity. I found out that the most exercise I get in a week is the day I go grocery shopping. I thought I was doing better physically then that but I guess if I was then I wouldn't have qualified to be a chubby little lab rat. I had to write down what I was doing all day long, what time it was done, how long it took, and how strenuous of an activity it was. I did get gyped on my physical activity record for one day. I spent one hour on one of those four days sexercising but how does one record that on there pedometer? I did write down that I was physically active for an our one evening ranging from moderate to heavy in intensity but didn't write down the description of the activity because I hadn't come up with something clever to write down, such as sexercise.
I was given a food scale so I could carefully record everything that I ate. This was quite a challenge in the beginning to weigh and measure everything edible that I put in my mouth but I did it and by the middle of day two it got easier.
I was also given a pedometer to record all of my physical activity. I found out that the most exercise I get in a week is the day I go grocery shopping. I thought I was doing better physically then that but I guess if I was then I wouldn't have qualified to be a chubby little lab rat. I had to write down what I was doing all day long, what time it was done, how long it took, and how strenuous of an activity it was. I did get gyped on my physical activity record for one day. I spent one hour on one of those four days sexercising but how does one record that on there pedometer? I did write down that I was physically active for an our one evening ranging from moderate to heavy in intensity but didn't write down the description of the activity because I hadn't come up with something clever to write down, such as sexercise.
I have to go to the bathroom
At my second appointment I met with the nutritionist in the study. She went over what I was to do for the next pretesting part of the study. They wanted me record everything edible that I put in my mouth for four days in a row as well as all my physical activity for those same four days. Notice the word "edible". It got me thinking do I put things in my mouth that are not edible? Is that a problem for some women, putting non edible things in there mouth? I make a mental note to make sure I don't record anything that isn't edible nor eat anything non edible.
I'm given a scale and a chard to keep track of all my edible food and a pedometer and chart to keep records of all my physical activity. I'm feeling a little overwhelmed by all of this record keeping and hoping I will end up looking good on paper.
The next part of this appointment I'm walked across the street to an other building on campus where I will have to do a walking test. I'm told that I will have to walk on a treadmill for 8 or so minutes while they monitor my hear rate and my blood pressure. I am shown a chair just out side the door of the testing room and told to wait here till there ready for me.
I'm in a basement of an old building that I have been in before when I went to school here. This basement has always creeped me out because it reminds me of what a creepy basement should be like. Glowing florescent lights, white walls, old tile floors and hallways that go every other way.
I'm sitting in the chair with one of the study staff waiting with me. She tells me it is going to be an other 10 minutes or so because they are running a little behind. I relies I have to go to the bathroom and have plenty of time seeing as how they are running late. I ask the staff person where the bathroom is an let her know I will be right back. She directs me down the hallway to the right and into the locker room on the right. I take a deep breath and tell my self I'm going to be brave and just use the bathroom. I walk down the hallway to the right making sure I'm paying attention to my surroundings, checking door way cutouts for bad guys just waiting to attack somebody ridiculous enough to walk around in a basement on a Saturday all by them selves. I make it to the woman's locker room which is right next to the men's. I push the door open telling my self, "this will only take a few seconds and you will be fine". I step into the locker room which is straight out of a horror film. those small quarter size hexagon floor tiles that are laid on an uneven wavy floor, buzzing florescent lights that are mounted to the ceiling with the wire covers over them, peeling wight and cream paint that is drooping off the walls at the sinks, and of course a few isles of wire basket lockers to top it all off. I walk into the part of the room where the toilet stalls are and I notice three circular drains on the floor. The image that of course flashes through my head is a man in a dark hooded sweatshirt with jeans and heavy boots jumping off a toilet and out of one of the stalls grabbing me and slashing me with a six inch bladed kitchen knife. Blood spattered on the walls, all over the floor and running down the drains. My hear starts to beat louder and harder. I know I need to pee but I know I can't allow myself to be that vulnerable in this place. I turn trying to walk but not run. Trying to breath by not cry. I walk out of the locker room quickly down the hall and back to the waiting chair.
The staff person is still there waiting for me and in a strange small talk sort of way asks me if I feel all better now. I tell her that actually I was too creeped out to use the bathroom and couldn't bring my self to do it even though I needed to. She so kindly offers to come with me. I'm thinking, "well I do need to pee and I'm going to be walking and I don't want to have to really pee while walking so sure I guess you can come with me to the bathroom." I tell her, "um, sure, ok, thank you." We walk together down the hall, I am still checking all the door ways. Into the locker room and I pretend that I don't see the blood splattered all over the walls and floor. I go into the stall, no bad guy, no boot prints on the toilet seat, I pull down my pants and have a seat. I can hear her walking around, I can hear her chewing her gum. How can I ever pee in these conditions? I try, honestly I do. I think about asking her to turn on the sink but really this has gotten strangely embarrassing all ready. So now I sit and think. Do I just get up and not go? Do I flush and pretend that I did go? I chose to get some tp put it in the toilet and flush, walk out and wash my hands. I really have to pee but I'm sure it isn't going to happen in this basement today. I tell staff thank you and she says, "no problem, I wouldn't like be be down here by my self either". I wonder if she can see the bloody masacar too. Just for your I will go done there again and take some pictures so you all can see I'm not crazy.
We walk back together and It is my turn to get walking. They hand me a hear rate monitor that needs to be placed around my body just under my breasts and under my shirt. Of course no screen to hide behind to privately place my monitor so here I am with my shirt up in front of the skinny study staff once more. And of course the monitor has to be wet, I really have a thing about putting wet things on me but oh well here we go.
Onto the treadmill I go. I start walking while two people watch me. One watches the computer monitor and increases my speed and incline while the other checks my blood pressure every three minutes. Their goal it to take me to 80% of my max and it should only take eight to ten minutes. Well I keep walking and walking and walking after fifteen minutes I'm still not there. They increase my incline once more and finally there after 18 minutes. It is funny walking while people watch you but I won't get into it because this post is already too long. They have me sit for a minute after the test and check my blood pressure once more. They say I'm ready to go and that I have a good heart and heart rate, YES!
I'm given a scale and a chard to keep track of all my edible food and a pedometer and chart to keep records of all my physical activity. I'm feeling a little overwhelmed by all of this record keeping and hoping I will end up looking good on paper.
The next part of this appointment I'm walked across the street to an other building on campus where I will have to do a walking test. I'm told that I will have to walk on a treadmill for 8 or so minutes while they monitor my hear rate and my blood pressure. I am shown a chair just out side the door of the testing room and told to wait here till there ready for me.
I'm in a basement of an old building that I have been in before when I went to school here. This basement has always creeped me out because it reminds me of what a creepy basement should be like. Glowing florescent lights, white walls, old tile floors and hallways that go every other way.
I'm sitting in the chair with one of the study staff waiting with me. She tells me it is going to be an other 10 minutes or so because they are running a little behind. I relies I have to go to the bathroom and have plenty of time seeing as how they are running late. I ask the staff person where the bathroom is an let her know I will be right back. She directs me down the hallway to the right and into the locker room on the right. I take a deep breath and tell my self I'm going to be brave and just use the bathroom. I walk down the hallway to the right making sure I'm paying attention to my surroundings, checking door way cutouts for bad guys just waiting to attack somebody ridiculous enough to walk around in a basement on a Saturday all by them selves. I make it to the woman's locker room which is right next to the men's. I push the door open telling my self, "this will only take a few seconds and you will be fine". I step into the locker room which is straight out of a horror film. those small quarter size hexagon floor tiles that are laid on an uneven wavy floor, buzzing florescent lights that are mounted to the ceiling with the wire covers over them, peeling wight and cream paint that is drooping off the walls at the sinks, and of course a few isles of wire basket lockers to top it all off. I walk into the part of the room where the toilet stalls are and I notice three circular drains on the floor. The image that of course flashes through my head is a man in a dark hooded sweatshirt with jeans and heavy boots jumping off a toilet and out of one of the stalls grabbing me and slashing me with a six inch bladed kitchen knife. Blood spattered on the walls, all over the floor and running down the drains. My hear starts to beat louder and harder. I know I need to pee but I know I can't allow myself to be that vulnerable in this place. I turn trying to walk but not run. Trying to breath by not cry. I walk out of the locker room quickly down the hall and back to the waiting chair.
The staff person is still there waiting for me and in a strange small talk sort of way asks me if I feel all better now. I tell her that actually I was too creeped out to use the bathroom and couldn't bring my self to do it even though I needed to. She so kindly offers to come with me. I'm thinking, "well I do need to pee and I'm going to be walking and I don't want to have to really pee while walking so sure I guess you can come with me to the bathroom." I tell her, "um, sure, ok, thank you." We walk together down the hall, I am still checking all the door ways. Into the locker room and I pretend that I don't see the blood splattered all over the walls and floor. I go into the stall, no bad guy, no boot prints on the toilet seat, I pull down my pants and have a seat. I can hear her walking around, I can hear her chewing her gum. How can I ever pee in these conditions? I try, honestly I do. I think about asking her to turn on the sink but really this has gotten strangely embarrassing all ready. So now I sit and think. Do I just get up and not go? Do I flush and pretend that I did go? I chose to get some tp put it in the toilet and flush, walk out and wash my hands. I really have to pee but I'm sure it isn't going to happen in this basement today. I tell staff thank you and she says, "no problem, I wouldn't like be be down here by my self either". I wonder if she can see the bloody masacar too. Just for your I will go done there again and take some pictures so you all can see I'm not crazy.
We walk back together and It is my turn to get walking. They hand me a hear rate monitor that needs to be placed around my body just under my breasts and under my shirt. Of course no screen to hide behind to privately place my monitor so here I am with my shirt up in front of the skinny study staff once more. And of course the monitor has to be wet, I really have a thing about putting wet things on me but oh well here we go.
Onto the treadmill I go. I start walking while two people watch me. One watches the computer monitor and increases my speed and incline while the other checks my blood pressure every three minutes. Their goal it to take me to 80% of my max and it should only take eight to ten minutes. Well I keep walking and walking and walking after fifteen minutes I'm still not there. They increase my incline once more and finally there after 18 minutes. It is funny walking while people watch you but I won't get into it because this post is already too long. They have me sit for a minute after the test and check my blood pressure once more. They say I'm ready to go and that I have a good heart and heart rate, YES!
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
The ad in the paper
So I was reading the local paper on line and saw an article about the local university looking for women 25-40 or so who were chubby and had plenty of belly fat, but not too much mind you (more on that later). I get all excited and decide to check it out. I am directed to a web sight where I answer a few questions probably so they can figure out just how chubby I am just to make sure I really am chubby but not overly chubby. I let two of my friends know about this study because what could be more fun then loosing weight with friends right? Well I get picked for the study and my friends don't and wouldn't you know it they were rejected for being too chubby! It broke my dear friend's heart to be too chubby to be in a weight loss study. Seriously, I think they should have been let in but I understand you need to be specific in your sample group when doing a study but still.
The first step after getting picked is a meeting on campus. Basically this meeting is all about what a large commitment being part of this study is going to be. Part of me is feeling sick at this point. Bad news #1 - Zumba class at 5:30 a.m. every Friday morning for 16 weeks. Bad news #2 - 1/2 the group will be put on a protein supplement. (Gross, please don't let me be part of that half) Bad news #3 - several tests and some tracking to be completed before the workouts and diet begins Bad news #4 - having to follow a diet plan and exercise plan for 16 weeks. Ok, this one is also good news #1 - having to do something and being accountable to someone is actually going to help me stay on track. Good news #2 - I will get to find out how healthy or not I am after receiving back all the results of all of these test I'm going to have to go through. Good news #3 - This study will not cost me a dime, that's right free Zumba classes all the free protein powder I will need should I be selected to be on that plan (counting on not being on the protein powder). Good news #4 - $50 at the end of the study if I follow all the rules.
At that meeting of course the weigh us and take our waist measurement. That is right, I had to lift my shirt while some skinny women measured this not so skinny women, I didn't appreciate it but hey at least I still fit in as just the right amount of chubbyness to participate. I also receive a thick questionnaire to fill out and a doctor's release to bring back on my next appointment.
I walk back to my car feeling excited and nervous. This is a big commitment and I don't like to fallow diets and don't even get me started on this whole protein powder crap but I don't want to be a chubby women for ever. I think this will be worth it if can get of this soft squishy belly fat.
The first step after getting picked is a meeting on campus. Basically this meeting is all about what a large commitment being part of this study is going to be. Part of me is feeling sick at this point. Bad news #1 - Zumba class at 5:30 a.m. every Friday morning for 16 weeks. Bad news #2 - 1/2 the group will be put on a protein supplement. (Gross, please don't let me be part of that half) Bad news #3 - several tests and some tracking to be completed before the workouts and diet begins Bad news #4 - having to follow a diet plan and exercise plan for 16 weeks. Ok, this one is also good news #1 - having to do something and being accountable to someone is actually going to help me stay on track. Good news #2 - I will get to find out how healthy or not I am after receiving back all the results of all of these test I'm going to have to go through. Good news #3 - This study will not cost me a dime, that's right free Zumba classes all the free protein powder I will need should I be selected to be on that plan (counting on not being on the protein powder). Good news #4 - $50 at the end of the study if I follow all the rules.
At that meeting of course the weigh us and take our waist measurement. That is right, I had to lift my shirt while some skinny women measured this not so skinny women, I didn't appreciate it but hey at least I still fit in as just the right amount of chubbyness to participate. I also receive a thick questionnaire to fill out and a doctor's release to bring back on my next appointment.
I walk back to my car feeling excited and nervous. This is a big commitment and I don't like to fallow diets and don't even get me started on this whole protein powder crap but I don't want to be a chubby women for ever. I think this will be worth it if can get of this soft squishy belly fat.
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